Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize