White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
