Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
