So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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