What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
