dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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