Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
