She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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