I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
you made out with another girl for some wings
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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