Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
