i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Randomize
