sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
