She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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