i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Randomize
