you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
