Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize