then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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