We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
