i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
