3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
