What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
