i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
There r osticjed everywhere
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize