we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
