he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
