He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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