I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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