if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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