So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
