Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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