but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
My dick has a subreddit
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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