Your dad touched me again.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
