Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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