Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
