so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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