I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
he puts the penis in happiness.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
