I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
