We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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