My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
