Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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