It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
