dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
