i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
my sisters under your porch take her home
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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