my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
