This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
