Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
we're so committed to being not committed
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
