It's like God shit irony all over that family
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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