and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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