Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
