I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
