Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
