Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
